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When a man showed a genuine interest in me, I would stop dating other men for one BIG reason: I lacked confidence to juggle several men at once because I doubted my self-worth.I was never comfortable playing the field by dating two guys at a time—I felt sneaky and unethical.Dating one man at a time is a mistake on several levels, that is: You invest your time, energy and emotions in a man and then weeks or months later you decide he’s the wrong man.
You weigh your pros and cons, you do your cost-benefit analysis, you use a little logic and a little emotion, and then make a largely arbitrary choice without knowing if you’re right. I stuck with that and avoided breaking a lot of hearts.Now, send yourself an i Note: A man is NOT your boyfriend until he tells you: you are the woman of his dreams, he wants you to meet his momma, he is closing his online dating account and he wants you to do the same and he asks you, do you prefer yellow gold or white gold jewelry. So many of my clients ask me whether dating more than one guy at a time is a wise idea.This is a somewhat complicated (but typical) example of how dating works. And neither party is under any obligation until both parties agree to commit to each other. Let’s say Bachelor #1 turns out to be a great guy…who admits after a month that he never wants to get married or have kids. Yes, I’m being a little tongue and cheek here – success in any arena should be celebrated, not resented – but I really don’t think you understand the average person’s dating experience.
I was never good at dating more than one man at time. Last month, I wrote to two men that I was very interested in.